Not having fully recovered from a cough-cold combination this past week, I decided to repair at a known coffee shop chain to have some tea before a yoga class. Mint tea has always worked wonders when I am in this state, and I certainly needed to be delivered from my suffering, if only for a brief moment.
Little did I know that my “deliverance” would take an entirely different form. The fact that it comes in the most unexpected fashion serves only to up the incredulity factor.
As circumstance/luck would have it (depending on what you believe), the barista regretfully informed me that they have run out of the particular tea variant I wanted. So I settled for a good old Americano, anything that would keep my throat warm.
Downloaded e-books, ready for devouring? Check.
Cozy seat at a slightly secluded area? Check.
Appropriately cool temperature from an artificial source? Check.
Barely delving into my copy of Sex, Bombs, and Burgers – an excellent read, by the way – I was jolted when someone pounded on the table, and exclaimed: “That is why God is our salvation!”
One of the men is obviously a “convertee”, the one being preached to. Reading the body language, it is clear that the “sermoner” thinks of himself as the alpha dog in this scenario: an overbearing position even when seated, forceful voice, showy gestures. The listener was seated in a calmer fashion, head tilted in an inquisitive manner, trying to digest the “sermon”.
There goes my quiet time to read and sip my cup of coffee.
“You cannot have any other gods, and any other means of salvation!” bellowed Preacher.
Listener responds: “In my religion…(he utters something a little muffled as he turns to his book of reference)…and we are responsible for that.”
“The way is clear!” responds Preacher. And then he looks around the room, eyes ablaze with the fire of his intent to proselytize, looks just for a brief moment at Listener, then addresses the “congregation” (read: the clueless customers of the coffeeshop):
“You, or anyone else (gesturing to all of us) will not be saved by your own merits! You are damned, damned, I tell you! Know Him! Know God! Only He can deliver you from eternal damnation!”
To the credit of Listener, he isn’t backing down that easily. But because he is hunched over, speaks with a softer voice, and his back turned away from me, I could barely hear his response.
I immediately get my earphones and turn on my iTunes library, lest I be subjected to more “damnation”.
Why is this man using a coffeeshop as his personal pulpit? Is it to “attract” more followers? Basic commandment in interpersonal relationships: Starting off a conversation with “You’re wrong, I’m right!” tends to be seen as offensive and an affront. Not to mention rude.
But I gather that all religions have that same stance: A predilection to tell anyone outside their own fold that they cannot be happy/saved/fulfilled unless they follow “their” way. After all, religious leaders fancy themselves as arbiters of absolute morality and therefore have to be thoroughly convinced of their own self-righteousness. And followers are always told that “you will suffer for your faith, you will be ridiculed, maligned, and tested!”
The only maligning I saw was from the Preacher telling us of our “uncleanliness”, sitting on his moral high horse, content in being judgemental.
Freedom of religion also means the right to be free from religion.
I respect your right to have your own faith, wear whatever religious iconography you deem makes you feel “closer” to your chosen deity, say your own prayers, read your own religious books. You can conduct a seance or dance naked in your garden, I don’t really care.
Why do people like Preacher have such a hard time returning that same courtesy?
I went to a coffeeshop to have my caffeine buzz, to read, and to be relaxed. I did not go there to have someone make ill pronouncements on my character or the state of my being in an afterlife scenario. I have made my disdain for organized religion abundantly clear. I loathe anyone exhibiting intolerance – which I cannot tolerate at any level.
It is not a personal attack on you if someone doesn’t subcribe to your faith. It merely means I am living my own life, on my terms. Deal with it.
And as for the third person in that hallowed table? It was an acolyte of Preacher, who kept nodding at every pronouncement made or every text read. Someone whose purpose was merely to say “Yes” at every turn.
It’s your choice to turn off your mind.
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Image from divinecrash.com
these kind of “preachers”, “pastors” or whatever give me creeps. They make me feel ignorant of the Bible. im not saying im a bible scholar but i study and understand the Bible as much as I can in Historical and Literary Context unlike those “religious peeps and doo-dads” who pick and choose passages from the Bible to suit and support their own religious and theological agenda. the Bible is literary masterpiece and these creeps, feeling they are heaven-bound with their self-righteousness, are no way respecting it. Been and done with “fundamentalist” and “evangelical” churchianity, i am a strong advocate of science, tolerance, human rights, secularism, and the Bible. Contradicting? Yes, to these creeps. 🙂
I can totally connect with the priest who went to write his sermon at the coffeeshop. I consider myself a very religious and spiritual person, and I have been in situations before when someone was trying to convert someone else. I felt uncomfortable because I felt like they were pressuring them too much, and I don’t think God would really want people to convert in this fashion. I want everyone to gain salvation and go to heaven, but I don’t believe in pressuring people into something they do not want to do. Religion is very personal, and like the priest, I believe that people need to be tolerant.
reminds me of university days xtian bible preaching movements using public spaces for students (for activities related to their studies) such as immediate outside border of library, for their noisy bible gatherings. what is known in xtian parlance as 'triumphalism'. the cheek – hgu!
The cafe staff should have told the intrusive guests to tone it down. If the cafe is catering to people looking for a cozy and quiet place to read, do homework, do some quiet browsing, that behavior is not acceptable. If I am the owner of the cafe I would have asked them to leave if they don't stop. It's like those annoying, money-collecting bible preachers in public transports. Walang talagang pinipiling lugar.
On the point that all religions actively proselytize, IIRC, Jews (Orthodox, anyway) don't go around looking for converts. Many Eastern religions (Sikhism, Hinduism, Buddhism) are mellow too, in that they don't ACTIVELY seek converts, or maintain that their religion is the "one true path to salvation".
In Zoroastrianism, adherence to the religion is "inherited". And off-topic, they have the coolest, most morbid form of burial (sky burial, Google, try not to look at the images if you're queasy).
Hmm, it seems like most monotheistic religions are those who proselytize. Probably because of the "one god" inclination.
I agree. For the most part, modern derivatives of Abraham-based religions seem to obsessed with increasing their numbers, either by conversion, subversion, or elimination.
You forgot the person who goes around holding the alms basket! Those people in the coffeeshop were obviously amateurs. What right-minded zealot would not take an opportunity to enrich the coffers, in such a place frequented by the "burgis"? Someone needs to undergo an indoctrination refresher.
As for Mormons, are these the same people who go from house to house, and when they force religious literature on you, strong-arm you into paying for it?
It's Christmas time again and the people who climb buses and jeeps and distribute envelopes for alms are in full force again. What I hate, most of all, is being told that I am going to hell, then being the victim of extortion afterwards.
'effin con artists.
re: mormons, I doubt its them. they're actually a very financial well-off organization. have you seen their temples in White Plains and Cebu? its gilded with actual gold and the construction is of the finest caliber, no expense was spared. locally I know of several very wealthy patrons to the Latter Day saints so I doubt they have to stoop to asking for money pa
So true!
The typical triumvirate for charismatics would be: the loud-mouth preacher, the head-bobbing sycophant, and the bewildered convertee. I'd be careful about getting too close, madalas may projectile spittle pa si zealous preacher when he gets carried away with the dramatic monologue.
Or would you prefer the Mormon triangle: 2 mormon guys in short-sleeve polo and you.
Please send me an sms next time this happens. I'll do my best to be there 🙂 0922 846 9925. This must have been a spectacle worth the examination psychiatrists.