I used to support the RH Bill. I no longer do. By the end of this document, neither would you. I have not supported the RH Bill since I attended a lecture in Megamall about the truth behind it. That lecture truly enlightened me. My only hope is that this holy light of enlightenment passes through your monitor screen, into your optical nerves, and into your heart so it can touch your soul (because the soul is in the heart). My intent here is not to antagonize Pro-RH people, but to enlighten – so listen up, you narrow-minded morons. Open your minds to the real truth…
The RH Bill will put Filipinos at risk of extinction, because, at its very core, the RH Bill is an extension of a secret, global conspiracy – a western attempt – to implement principles of eugenics on unsuspecting, inferior populations in order to exclude them from the human evolutionary process, at the end of which would, at the apex, summon forth THE MASTER RACE. Anyone who failed to see this after the lecture is ignorant. I advise him or her to do his or her research, better yet, do some soul-searching to discover the real truth, because the truth is in our hearts, we just have to listen to it.
Initially, my layman’s interpretation of the RH Bill led me to think that it was just a bill meant to help educate the uninformed about ways to prevent them from fornicating their way to a very bad financial situation. My ignorant mind devised 10 simple points as to why the RH Bill was right.
I thought:
1. The minimum wage – the lowest an employer can pay an employee – of a non-agricultural Filipino worker is P404.
2. If there were 20 working days in a month (because most people don’t work on the weekend), the average minimum-wage-earning Filipino would earn around P8,000 a month.
3. Let’s call that person, Joey. If Joey, like other human beings, ate food on a regular basis, he will spend around P70/day on food (and that’s a very, very conservative assumption). There are 30 days in a month, so I guess, that would amount to P2,100 a month.
4. But if Joey had a wife that he loved, he might want to feed her too. Feeding her would cost another P2,100 a month.
5. P8,000 – P4,200 = P3,800
6. If Joey and his wife rented a home, or used electricity and bathed from time to time, the amount left from Joey’s salary would be significantly reduced. Let’s say their utility bills and rent amounted to P1800.
7. P3,800 – P1800 = P2,000
8. P2,000 is a lot of money, but I don’t think Joey and his wife should have more than 3 children, right? I mean, I don’t have children, but just by looking at one, I can safely assume that they cost more than P1,000/month. Babies need milk, diapers, toys, immunity injections, baby medicine…
9. From this I deduced that babies cost money. If babies cost money, I theorized that having more babies would cost more money. And from this data, I observed that a person who spent a lot of money on children, but didn’t earn a lot of money, would soon be broke and unable to provide for both himself and his children. Another word for this broke situation is poverty.
10. I theorized that a person can avoid being poor by making less babies. So, I thought that steps should be taken to inform people about this very little known fact. I also thought that the government should make contraceptives accessible so that people who don’t earn a lot can properly manage the little resources that they have. That’s why I supported the RH Bill.
But now I know that I was wrong. And here are some of the reasons why I know that. By the way, before I continue, I must say that this is the truth, guys. In fact, it’s more than the truth. It’s the Catholic truth, which means that it’s truer and more true than the regular truth.
I know that the issue of the RH Bill is not a religious issue, but make sure you pay attention if you want your soul to be saved. Here are some of the things I learned from the lecture I learned:
“The RH Bill is wrong because it assumes that the Philippines is overpopulated.”
I agree. I, myself, have observed that the Philippine is NOT overpopulated. In fact, if you use your common sense and think about it, you will realize a few things:
1. We are not overpopulated! Look at the mountains, the jungles, the caves and the ocean floor. There are no people there!
2. If we were really overpopulated, we would have trouble travelling. But if you go to EDSA, there’s no traffic. When you ride the MRT, it’s not packed with people.
3. Students in public schools are well educated because the teacher to student ratio is very low. In fact, because of our low population the government can basically guarantee that all public school students are provided books, notebooks and other school supplies.
“The RH Bill is wrong because it assumes that contraceptives are good for mankind and women.”
1. I agree, the RH Bill is not good for women because it might draw a woman away from her one, true, universal purpose – the uninterrupted production of healthy babies.
2. Furthermore, the role of women in society and the universe is to make babies. That’s why God made women. That’s their sole purpose in life. They’re not good for anything else. Ever wonder why there are no women in the clergy? Because they’re not good enough.
3. Contraceptives would allow women to enjoy the benefits of physical intimacy while maintaining a successful and productive career, if she so chooses. That is so wrong. Only men should be able to enjoy that privilege.
4. Women should get pregnant every single time they have sex and only immoral women enjoy sex without the possibility of conception. In fact, a better alternative would be for women, in general, to follow the example made by Mother Mary – to learn how to conceive without having sex.
“The RH bill will put Filipinos at risk of extinction!”
1. I agree. If we pass the RH bill, we will become extinct, like dinosaurs. The dinosaurs are all dead. If we don’t want to be extinct, we should not pass the RH Bill. I mean, do you really want to be a dinosaur?
2. In my opinion, it wouldn’t even be far-fetched to speculate that the most probable reason the dinosaurs became extinct was because they used contraceptives.
3. Population decline is just bad for nations. Just look at the countries which have a declining population – Italy, Japan and Singapore. They’re in such a bad shape. The Philippines obviously has a better economy and has a higher literacy rate than these countries. In fact, many Italians, Japanese, and Singaporeans go to the Philippines for work. That only goes to show that a decline in population is bad for the economy.
“Our population is our biggest asset!”
1. In my opinion, people should make as many babies as they can because the population is not a problem. In fact, the more babies a person has, the more assets he has. Forget real estate properties, stock investments, or Jollibee franchises. The real secret to increased wealth is babies.
2. If you have 15 babies, you’re practically wealthy because babies are assets:
2.1 If you need money, you can sell them.
2.2 If you can keep them alive until they can walk, they can one day beg for money in the streets – they’re going to have to anyway because there’s no way in hell you’ll be able to provide for all of them on your own.
3. If ever a person is not able to feed the 15 babies he made, it’s the governments fault, because it’s the governments sole responsibility to make sure that every Filipino baby is fed.
4. The best way a person can contribute to his country is to contribute to its population.
“The RH Bill is wrong because it assumes that reproductive education and contraceptives will effectively reduce cases of abortion.”
1. Reproductive/contraceptive education will have no effect on the number of abortion cases. In my opinion, these abortion cases will not lessen because women will continue to have abortions regardless of whether they are pregnant or not.
2. Abortions cannot be prevented. It’s just something that women naturally do. Like shopping, for example.
“The RH Bill is wrong because it will make people participate in extra-marital and pre-marital sex.”
1. By approving the RH Bill, we as a nation, are practically encouraging our people to engage in immoral activities.
2. We must protect our moral values and reject the RH Bill. Because, currently, not a single Filipino engages in pre-marital sex or extra-marital sex. As soon as this bill is approved, Filipino people will run the streets naked and start a national orgy!
3. The root cause of extra-marital and pre-marital sex is one’s exposure to contraceptives. There is just something in contraceptives that people find very arousing.
4. In Western countries, men lure strange women into bed by showing them condoms.
5. If we ban condoms, absolutely no one would engage in pre-marital or extra-marital sex.
“The RH Bill is wrong because it assumes that parents don’t teach their children about sex.”
1. The truth is that parents talk to their children about sex all the time. It’s so not awkward. The dad usually tells his children how he takes off all his clothes, does a sexy Tiger growl and makes sweet, sweet music with their mother’s body.
2. Also, a father usually advises his daughter that if she’s going to have sex with her boyfriend, she should use a condom. Sometimes the father even drives the daughter to the boyfriend’s house and waits for the couple to finish.
3. Filipino daughters don’t have sex without the father’s permission. Unwanted pregnancies or teen pregnancies never happen to Filipino girls. That’s why we do not need the RH Bill.
“The RH Bill is a conspiracy.”
1. It’s lies, all lies!
“The RH Bill is wrong because the priest said so, and priests are never wrong.”
The biggest reason why we should not pass the RH Bill is because the priests told us that we shouldn’t. As anyone should know, priests, men of the clergy, should be the authority on sexual and reproductive matters because they have the most knowledge and experience with sex and reproduction. They are true sexperts – legendary masters of erotic affairs. If you are a real Catholic, you would do everything they say, because they’re always right.
Give it to the writer..He's already gone senile
Ahahahahah…
Really laughed my ass off after reading this. Yeah, the author's friggin right. Let's not support the RH bill and let the priests and clergy guys take care of the babies, feed 'em, educate 'em, and pay the hospital bills when they get sick.
haha natawa ko dito.
lahat ng nagcomment dito puro tukmol feeling mga matatalino? satirical lang at sarcastic masyado na big deal sainyo? ang masasabi ko lang, kung nagbabanat kayo ng buto at ginagamit nyo pinagaralan nyo sa mabuting bagay may pag-asa pa makabangon ang bansang pilipinas. wag kasi kayo puro satsat. magsumikap tayo. gumawa tayo ng kabutihan sa kapwa huwag puro salita at hilahan pababa.
oo nga, tukmol ka din at feeling matalino. nagcomment ka din e. 🙂 ikaw kaya ang magbanat ng buto.
feeling matalino nagets lang ang sarcasm :)) nagsimula kang inutil, tukmol =))
Oh and one more thing: another reason why we feel that the Philippines is overpopulated is because there are a lot of people from the provinces coming to look for jobs or education in Metro Manila. Actually, the Philippines is not overpopulated rather there are overcrowded areas especially cities. If we could just develop and empower provinces (which by the way are also 'huge chunks' of land BUT remain UNDERDEVELOPED) the need to come to Metro Manila would be lessened..
Food for thought: Would you say RH Bill = Free sex? Come to think of it, would the RH Bill actually address this generation’s ‘twisted’ views about intimacy? I mean we could probably “cure” the nation’s booming population but it could also spell the downfall of our morals. (or maybe its NOT that important anymore, since we’re in a “post-modern” culture) Anyone and everyone can enjoy sex without having to worry about its consequences. It may not seem like it now but when you look at it from a different perspective, it would most likely happen.. It happened in the States already, safe sex became a cover for free sex, (considering younger and younger people are being more promiscuous these days)
Lol, I nearly got taken with this one….But being subtle does a lot more for introspection than simply stating the facts outright…
At first sir.. before even reading anything.. I was ready to believe.. Ah.. Maybe the RH bill isn’t that good after all.. Eh? That ” Damaso ” post guy That I saw from TV must have been wrong..
He’s gonna get excommunicated..
And some of my Facebook friends had Anti RH bill quotes as their statuses..
I seriously don’t know anything about the RH Bill except that it was about implementing Sex Education in Schools or something about condoms… And wait what? I was at Megamall and I didn’t hear about something like this.. I even saw some calculations wow.. Impressive.. But then..
I started to read on.. At the part about the Dinosaurs and EDSA.. I was like.. ” Huh? This guy must not have been to Edsa or He must have never ridden an Mrt train his entire life..
And practically thought this was crap when I read these 2 lines
” 2.1 If you need money, you can sell them. ”
” 2. Furthermore, the role of women in society and the universe is to make babies. That’s why God made women. That’s their sole purpose in life. They’re not good for anything else. Ever wonder why there are no women in the clergy? Because they’re not good enough.”
Some sick Logic you got there..
This doesn’t even make any sense at all..
Then it hits me.. And I notice.. err.. Is this sarcasm?
It finally sinks in.. Oh!!!! I feel so trolled..
Yun pala yun.. (So that’s whats this is all about)
Hahaha!! IMBA!!
” They are true sexperts – legendary masters of erotic affairs. If you are a real Catholic, you would do everything they say, because they’re always right. ”
Hahaha… I can only laugh on how slow I caught up on this..
Anyway sir.. You have succeeded in changing something in me..
And I’m sharing these to my friends on Facebook.. 🙂
“I agree. If we pass the RH bill, we will become extinct, like dinosaurs.” This statement is funny. Lol. I think that the implementation of the RH bill would definitely benefit the Philippines because it will help control our population. By controlling the population, people will be given more opportunities such as – job offerings and the like. But oh well we have all of our opinions. 🙂
good job to the author! hahah this article is hilarious! :))
1st and 2nd paragraph pa lang, sana nabasa niyo na ang sarcasm. well sa hindi mga nakaintindi, palagay ko napurol na ang mga utak ninyo kapapanood ng willing willie. 😛
very well said. 🙂 bless you! :)))
Dapat na gegets ng mga tao ang article n to. Pa obvious ng pa obvious naman habang binabasa ito hanggang dulo. Hays, /facepalm.
HAHA! This is hilarious! Great job at the sarcasm! 😀
:)) Nice article! LOL at those who don't appreciate satire.. They're the kind of folks who think the Onion is a real news network.. Hahahah!
Oh my fucking god! this article made my day!
Naka-categorize na nga sa HUMOR aba'y sineryoso pa ng iba.
Galing ng writer!:) Funny and sensible and effective (for me).
I know! I bet mapapaisip din mga ANTI-RH BILL haha! 😀 Actually nung nabasa ko ung sa overpopulation sobrang tawa talaga ako eh haha
hahaha, Excellent article buddy!
I am Hungarian, but have lived in and love the Philippines. The only thing that makes me sad every time is the religious blindness, which keeps the Pinoy society on a level comparable to Europe in the middle ages. There is so much potential in your country, It is truly the pearl of the Orient, who knows how advanced the islands could be with some education and enlightenment.
Maraming maraming salamat for yung article to. I hope every filipino reads it and understands its message. I love you Filipinos, please raise, healthy, happy, financially secure children, one happy child is better than 15 in a slum, and knowing your Pinoy spirit that child will be a musical prodigee anyways! Dont let the Church keep you in slavery. Sipag at Chaga!
Well said sir/ma'am! 😀 I agree with one happy child is better than 15 in a slum 🙂
Good one, dear sir!
mga doods (na di naka-gets ng article na 'to)–alam ba ninyo ang sarcasm? hahahaha!
I kinda feel sorry for all the people who couldn't get the humor behind this article.
AHAHAHAHAHA
" [priests] should be the authority on sexual and reproductive matters because they have the most knowledge and experience with sex and reproduction"
sige nga, tanongin mo ung mga pari tungkol withdrawal, tungkol natural birth control, tungkol sex, tanungin mo sila regarding abstinence which for them is "mandated" they dont actually have that much of a choice
SERIOUSLY, PRO OR ANTI RH BILL KA BA? you wite like an Anti-RHB yet your points tell your readers na PRO ka
this is actually a Pro hahaha in a sarcastic way :))
Have you not heard of the term sarcasm?
apparently he has not even remotely encountered the term…LOL
palagay ko gusto naman talaga ni arson na maging sarcastic din siya. 'di lang talaga natin na-feel yung sarcasm niya. :))
Sarcasm: The ability to insult an idiot without them realizing. =))))
kaw na marunong mag-Google.
then let your children live in the mountains, the jungles, the caves and the ocean floor!
if you enjoy traffic! then drive at EDSA every noon time!
2. Furthermore, the role of women in society and the universe is to make babies. That’s why God made women. That’s their sole purpose in life. They’re not good for anything else. Ever wonder why there are no women in the clergy? Because they’re not good enough.
napaka-sexist mo! human beings purpose is not just to create babies but also to raise them properly, to provide them with a decent future.
sarcastic po ito. translation: mapang-uyam nakakatuya ; nakauuyam ; mapanuya ; nanunuya ; nakakauyam ; mapanguyam ; nang uuyam ; tuya; opposite sa sinsabi
galing mag-Google ah
lol! di mo na gets ang tinutumbok ng article.
great article! love the comments too lol! im proRH but i must confess i still haven't read up on the whole bill… my friend said she wasn't 100% for it because one part has something about imprisonment for people who spread malicious disinformation (did i get that right?) — parang harsh naman nun
everyone, take note of Poe's Law (look it up).
I wasn't able to detect the sarcasm myself until his first point, but when I did, it was priceless. this article is probably the best read I've had in a while. keep it up!
akala ko seryosong NO to RH Bill hahahah — catchy title…
jeez! dapat maging subject n sa school ang sarcasm. wahahhahahaa
dustin = troll
rashine = bigger troll
you are the moron. moron.
This article is so wrong on all levels!!! My gahd, if there's really a god. Yesterday, I consider myself as a freethinker but if I will be belonging in this group with this author, I will not consider myself as a freethinker anymore! My gahd, so bobo. eewww. duh
OK enough, nag-iisip lang ako ng mga posible pang maging comments sa article na ito. Joke lang yung nasa itaas. Mas nagdedicate pa ako ng oras sa pagbabasa ng mga nakakaaliw comments kaysa sa mismong article.
Pero sana maipasa na ang RH bill. Naiinis ako kasi kahit noong election last year, isa na ito sa mainit na usapin pero wala pa rin. Habang nadedelay ito, lahat talo. Sabi nga, justice delayed, justice denied. Ganoon din dito, RH bill delayed, choice to have a better life denied.
haynaku, hindi ka bagay maging freethinker, and you will never be qualified to be one. Kailangan ng mataas na I.Q. para ma-consider as a freethinker, and judging by your diction, you're one big failure of brain cells. Siguro magkamag-anak yung parents mo kaya ka retarded.
Dmo po ata nabasa ung whole post nya haha
a sarcastic comment
This article is in bad taste.
The article made the ANTI-RH sound like Morons. On over population with reference to – there is still land space underwater .. funny yeah .. but hey look at Hong Kong and compare it to Makati. I think we all know what Population can mean. This is nothing. And I don't think the Hong Kong folks are complaining with their population .. they can provide jobs pa nga to the thousands of Pinoy DH's there eh. Why aren't they employing the mainland 'poor'? Because even the Mainlanders have better options than being a maid.
Population doesn't equate to poverty.
In your eyes, the kids on the slums are 'POOR' but ask any of them if they wish they weren't born na lang. Or for that matter, the 3rd kid will say, sana wala na lang yung pang 8th namin.
Ridiculous argument.
Yeah I'm anti-RH bill. Its one big government condom contract lang yan. Mothers are getting SSS funding na for their maternity needs noh. Up to 5 kids pa.. the RH bill will limit it to 2 nga lang eh.
Gusto magpatali ni Mrs? E di magmid-wife sya na mas murang option that a hospital delivery and use the rest of the SSS money sa pagpapatali. Matalino naman ang Pinoy no. Hindi nagpatali, kasi ayaw magpatali.
The arguments are all twisted na. The current laws are more RH friendly pa than what is being proposed now. Free contraceptives lang bottom line ng bill na to.
This is a scam! Listen. Someone will profit from this.
Wow, tangina ang bobo mo naman! You obviously know nothing about how Hong Kongers think! I have relatives who were born and raised in HK, and most HKers decry the sparse land space that is available. The vast majority of them live in flats, which are little more than cramped shoeboxes. When they visited us here, they marvelled at the fact that we had a garden and big garage despite not being wealthy. In HK, only the very rich can afford a house and lot. Why is that? Because HK real estate is extremely pricey. Again, why? Because a huge concentration of people in a small space equates to earning power per square meter. The more congested a place, the more expensive to live there. This is true even for poor countries like the Philippines (compare Manila and provincial land prices) or rich countries like Singapore. Is that what you want the Phils to become? An overcongested place with little money to spend for basic services like health and education?
Also, look at your comment–you contradict yourself on so many points! And then you ask if a kid would wish that he/she weren't born? Fuckin' amazing. Who in his/her right mind would say that? Only a retarded Mongoloid like you would say that population does not equal poverty. The most populated countries in the world are by and large POOR. Even China, with its red-hot economy, has more than 800 million peasants who cannot afford decent education for their kids. India is another booming economy that has millions of squatters. The best-performing countries in the world are in Scandinavia, where the ratio of population to national resources is well-managed.
Meanwhile, the best way to stop population overgrowth is to eliminate stupid people like YOU! Pag nawala ka sa mundong ito, mas mag-i-improve ang human evolution dahil nabawasan ng isang bobo. Tangang puta.
Well, Mr. Gunter Mendelsohn, I am glad not to have you in my inner circle of freethinkers. But you, sir, have been reported. Hope to have made your day!
Think. If you may. Kung kaya lang ah. Do you see hongkong people complaining about food?
Think.
They're complaining that space is expensive, but they live in flats. FLATS. They can afford food!
Think.
You go on the rampage of being PRO-rh for an emendate knee-jerk reaction that the Philippines need new laws to make it ok. Its the governance thats the problem.
And to resort to call me stupid. Magpakitaan na lang tayo ng bank account you want?
This is not a you vs me issue here. Think before making a stand.
This bill is bigger than you. This wanton proclamation of being pro-RH for the coolness of it, na it being pro-woman, Anti-Church and all that shit, will get EVERYONE in trouble. WE DON'T HAVE THE MONEY FOR THIS. The teachers are starving. The military and police are idiots because they're not trained properly because we dont have a budget to train them.
Think.
That is all I ask.
Only a Mongoloid like me .. Uhm ok. So having the RH bill, with the eventual population control it proposes, which I highly doubt, 2 kids then no more RH bill for you, this sorry-na-lang-e-tanga-ka-bill, will change the situation of your country. You are being manipulated. Its all about a free contraceptives contract that someone will profit on. The current laws are more PRO-RH.
The current laws provides maternity benefits to mothers up to 5 kids. This RH bill will limit it to 2. How is that reproductive health sound?
Hong Kong became what it is for the sheer number of their people. The way the government reacted to their population was to provide jobs.
MORE JOBS.
In the end the RH bill seeks to cut the population since wala naman ng trabaho. Tanga. Katangahan.
Attract more jobs.
You are being used. Read the RH bill. See it for what its worth. MOST of the stuff there that you vehemently are objecting to are currently LEGAL and being ADDRESSED. Except for the free contraceptives.
Get the Church's argument out of the picture. Contraceptives are LEGAL. Yes, go to 7/11 if you haven't used one.
ZTE. Hello. This is a scam.
Think my fellow anti-Church countrymen. I am anti-church too and I adhere to Contraceptives.
No to freebees. You're just giving our already corrupt… and read, this is what is NOW, governance license to steal some more. TV's and vans for the campaign. Hello how about doing a TV-based campaign. Yes they can afford to have TVs, or have access to it. Just look at Willing WIlly.
Agenda is wrapped around the GOODY TWO SHOES premise this bill is aspiring for.
AGENDA. And you're being played.
God save the Philippines.
PRIESTS ARE ALWAYS RIGHT? Think again!!!
GOVERNMENT ARE ALWAYS RIGHT? Think again!!! :p
My god, this bill is not about priests. Can everyone just stop to Think.
AND READ the RH bill.
And read our existing laws.
The things you argue about and the things the Church are against are CURRENT LAWS.
This RH bill is a mere propaganda.
You, intelligent you, are not so intelligent after all.
Don't get swayed because Lea Salonga or Ces Drillon, or whoever cool celebrity is endorsing this bill, is endorsing it. Or even this 21 year old author.
Author, its a cheap shot. Cute, I give you that. An article of a 21 year old, yeah I give that to you as well.
That is outright Moronic.
This is a propaganda.
KAGAT NAMAN LAHAT.
Hence, a poor Philippines. Soooo easy to manipulate. So easy.
Laitin nyo man lahat ng Tanga na hindi nakaintindi, hindi nyo din naintindihan ang totoong issue at hand.
So lahat na lang tayo Tanga. Magbasa nga muna. I-google. Nasa internet ang RH bill.
After that, contemplate and meditate all the aftermaths it can bring. Without any bias or opinion. Pure logic.
I've been sitting on this position for sometime now and the more I read about the arguments of the PRO-RH, the more I am convinced that this is a propaganda.
The existing laws PROVIDE for most of the issues presented, except for free contraceptives. FREE, contraceptives.
Contraceptives are legal.
Free .. lets give dole outs. Never mind the starving teachers and dilapidated classrooms we have. Free! We have a lot of money! Lets give out everything for FREEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
PRE-NATAL care my ass. SSS gives benefits to mothers up to the 5th child. The RH bill will only limit it to 2. So how is this more RH friendly? "Sorry misis, pang 5 mo na ba, tanga mo kasi eh, pero di na pwede free ang labor mo. Bawal sa law"
Nevermind that all of them have cellphones anyway. and pang-load ….. but no money to buy condoms daw.
God save us! I hope this message reach you with an open mind. I am pro-RH but not this bill. FLAWED. and yes you are supporting a FLAWED, ZTE-ish friendly, bill.
Again, when a bill is passed, so is passed are all its flaws. KACHING! KACHING!
KACHING KACHING KACHING!
Sucker.
JuanTalino = sucker
There are better reasons to your stand. Your reasoning is… for the lack of a better word… stupid. Try living in a cave.
try searching for the word sarcasm = ))))))
i THINK the article is so gay… It is very anti-women…
This article is a satire. Unfortunately, you are not intelligent enough to discern that fact. It is actually very pro-women and pro-choice.
Well, I THINK that you're not thinking at all. 🙂
No one needs to do research on his points, if you're a Filipino you already know the truth about these. But dudes, the author presents this article not to flood you with facts but to stimulate your minds and rethink of what you already know in a funny way. this is just the same with how comedians make people laugh, we are laughing out the truths and the way they deliver their lines is just a bonus! what would you gain if you correct his statements that are fabricated as we all knew? you gain bashing and clearly it is out of ignorance, this is not informative, this is satirical. well in this case, some people here should do research on satires rather than the figures, number of passengers, who lives where, ratios and economic status of the country to use against the author. well good luck to all of you who didn't get this article, instead of being so smart you proved yourselves to be so ignorant. we should commend the author for this well written article. UP Diliman right? cool BD
YES TO RH BILL! 😀
I wonder why many would decide solely based on a sarcastic piece. The Vatican has the smallest population in the world, yet they do not need to give away contraceptives.
Sarcasm is fun. That is all i can say. LOL. Hehehehhee!
mga kaibigan, irespeto natin ang mga ilang mga kapwa nating hindi nakaunawa ng napakagandang literaturang ito. sa totoo, hindi ko rin siya naintindihan sa mga unang parte. sumama lang ang pakiramdam ko nung sabihin niyang gumamit ng contraceptive ang mga dinosaurs, kasi mahirap un, mabubutas ang condom kasi matutusok ng mga kuko nila. rashine palma, mahal na kita. 🙂
anong maganda? isa tong panginsulto na hindi naman man lang constructive. to reduce the stand of the ANTI-RH as pre-historic and outright moronic is not cool at all.
Satire my ass. And as such should it just be ingested because its funny.
This is a real issue, bigger than you and me. To bring it down to this level of analogy will only bring the moronic, yes including you, to a lesser understanding of what is going on.
You are being played big time. KACHING if this bill is passed. This bill has complex dynamics bigger than you. Discern well before before proclaiming that you are pro-rh bill. It can get everyone into trouble.
With this bill, there would be less budget for the already starving teachers who are tending to our marginalized poor children .. so they'd leave and become DH's abroad.
With this bill, the moronic cops of the bus hostage taking in Manila will still have NO proper training to handle a hostage taking crisis.
Less money for the other current laws that ARE NOT EVEN BEING IMPLEMENTED WELL.
Be discerning. This is a big issue and a mere joke, as this article is, which apparently is making it cool, is not helping.
An RH bill is good for the country, but amend it. It has FLAWS. When a bill is passed, all its flaws gets passed as well.. and at its current state, someone will get rich, FILTHY RICH.
You are being played. You can buy Condoms in 7/11. This is not a Contraceptives Bill.
hi juan talino. 🙂 please stop reading humor articles if you tend to take all things seriously. thank you. anyway, your reply is longer than my comment, what are you trying to accomplish? are you trying to convert me? try harder. and again, I hope that you will stop reading things posted as humor because you can't just get it.
Mr.JuanTalino, sa tingin ko, ang article na ito ay intended para sa mga taong gustong ma-entertain. Unang una, hindi pa implemented ang batas na 'to, at hindi ito ang venue para pag-debatehan ang isang Bill na sinusubukan palang naman ipasa.
And I don't think people possessing an acceptable level of IQ are just "ingesting this cause it is funny". May kanya-kanyang utak 'yan. Come on, You should know better 🙂
Sana may nabibili din na Sense of Humor sa 7/11. Hihi, pax! 🙂
Very unprofessional Mr. JuanTalino. Kung gusto mo makipag-debate, wag kang mamersonal (ref. to "To bring it down to this level of analogy will only bring the moronic, yes including you, to a lesser understanding of what is going on.")..
Nga pala.. This level of analogy na sinasabi mong mababa. Well, hindi 'to mababang level ng analogy. I think you should have a better understanding first of what the article is about.
ANG TANGA MO RASHINE PALMA!
SAY YES TO RH BILL!!
:D:D:D Bahahahahaha!!!!!:D:D:D
What the fuck, I can't believe how many idiots are commenting to this article… Nakakatawa na nakakatakot. Napurol na siguro ang mga utak kaka-nood ng TV. The author of the article must be laughing his ass off.
lol. Sir… It must be the product of inbreeding. You know… Too many relatives to take the time to know each one of them and as such alot of people end up making babies with their cousins or worse, their half-sister.
Onga, kawawa ang Pinas pag maraming tanga tulad ng mga indi nakaintindi ng satire. Ito rin yung rason na maraming hindi nakaunawa na yung article ni Chip Tsao ("nation of servants") was actually pro-Filipino and anti-Chinese, despite Tsao being Chinese himself. It's all sarcasm, but sadly very few Pinoys get that kind of humor.
they are not idiots they are just slow learner but it do not mean that they are stupid.
I thought this guy was stupid until I realized it was a satire. This is genius! Kudos to the author!
how can abortion be like shopping.. u can't have abortion if ur not pregnant u know..
and aren't u a little bit sexist?? i mean how can u say that "That’s why God made women. That’s their sole purpose in life. They’re not good for anything else. Ever wonder why there are no women in the clergy? Because they’re not good enough."
and lastly not all the things that the priest are true that u should follow.. they are guidelines its always your right to choose.
learn to look at the point of view of other because u might offend others
Okay ka lang? Sa justification mo pa lang sa overpopulation sa Pilipinas sablay na eh. Tanga ka ba? Overpopulated tayo. Matindi traffic sa Manila. At sobrang katangahan yung sinabi mong kayang suportahan ng gobyerno ang mga estudyante sa public schools.
And aybe you're a victim of the priests' "sexpert"-ness. Priests of the past have gotten into a lot of controversies. Dude, you're so fucked.
This is ridiculous.
The priests say so? Who follows the priests? Am I to assume that filipinos of other religions are supposed to follow the priests as well? And overpopulation is not being crammed in one place. Overpopulation is the disproportion of resources available to the number of people who are using those resources. This Article went from being funny to being annoying.
to the author, pasensyahan mo na lang ang mga taong mababa ang low IQ.. Hindi sila sanay magbasa ng mga article na may ibang literary techniques..
Something to think about:
National Security Study Memorandum 200: Implications of Worldwide Population Growth for U.S. Security and Overseas Interests (NSSM200)
The basic thesis of the recently declassified memorandum was that population growth in the least developed countries (LDCs) is a concern to U.S. national security, because it would tend to risk civil unrest and political instability in countries that had a high potential for economic development. The policy gives “paramount importance” to population control measures and the promotion of contraception among 13 populous countries, to control rapid population growth which the US deems inimical to the socio-political and economic growth of these countries and to the national interests of the United States, since the “U.S. economy will require large and increasing amounts of minerals from abroad”, and these countries can produce destabilizing opposition forces against the United States. It recommends the US leadership to “influence national leaders” and that “improved world-wide support for population-related efforts should be sought through increased emphasis on mass media and other population education and motivation programs by the U.N., USIA, and USAID.”
Thirteen countries are named in the report as particularly problematic with respect to U.S. security interests: India, Bangladesh, Pakistan, Indonesia, Thailand, the PHILIPPINES, Turkey, Nigeria, Egypt, Ethiopia, Mexico, Colombia, and Brazil. These countries are projected to create 47 percent of all world population growth.
The report advocates the promotion of education and contraception and other population control measures. It also raises the question of whether the U.S. should consider preferential allocation of surplus food supplies to states that are deemed constructive in use of population control measures.
http://www.physiciansforlife.org/index2.php?optio…
The truth is that parents talk to their children about sex all the time. It’s so not awkward. The dad usually tells his children how he takes off all his clothes, does a sexy Tiger growl and makes sweet, sweet music with their mother’s body.
-hahahaha
haha!! poor analysis philippines not overpopulated? go to manila tapos tambay ka sa squaters.. sakay ka lrt pag rush hour.. tapos patirahin mo sa bundok? caves? forest? lol!! parang business lng yan kailangan mo ng magandang pwesto para kumita. so meaning kailangan mo ng magandang lugar na accesible para kumita ka :)fyi.. sa modern world ngaun affected na tyo ng western culture.. youths nowadays are more liberated.. di katulad nung araw na takot silang idiscuss ang sex with their families.. ngaun sa friends na nila and they are curious.. and sa current state ng philipppines ngaun every parent ngaun kumakayod kasi nga mahirap mabuhay sa philippines.. sino kakausap? tinutulungan lng ng bill na ito na ienlighten ang youth sa sex education.. ang masama kasi sa inyo pag sinabing sex eh takot na kyo basic need po yan ng human di mo maiiwaasan habang tumatanda tyo nagmamature tyo at nagkakaroon ng pagtingin sa opposite sex.. and fyi.. sa sex education na ituturo sa grade 5 eh di tungkol sa sex literally.. tinuturo dito ang values ang value ng filipino sa kanyang family.. at tinuturo dito ang isa sa pinakawala ang most youths natin ngaun kung pano maging RESPONSABLE!! don’t tell me that this bill promotes premarital sex because that’s shit.. read the bill!! and about japan.. declining rate ng fertility rate nila.. fyi there’s a study kung bakit mababa ang fertility rate ng japan.. human’s in developed countries consumes more energy na nakakaafect sa humans.. to clarify you check this ( http://search.japantimes.co.jp/cgi-bin/fe20090208… ).. and last priests are never wrong? bakit katoliko ba relihiyon ng buong philippines? selfish? i’m a catholic and i attend mass every sunday.. what i don’t like about attending the mass is they encouraged they’re locals to not support the bill.. excuse me? every man has his own opinion.. some anti says anti’s are demons.. immorals etc etc.. na alam nating masakit.. pero sige kami na masama kung mapasa man itong bill na to.. kami na demonyo.. wag lng maghirap ang mga susunod na generation ng hindi nila ma experience ang kakulangan ng trabaho.. ang magraduate ng kurso tinapos mo ng 4 na taon tapos nakatanga lng.. ang magutom.. kung pano iisipin ng isang pamilya ang pagkain nila sa isang araw.. kung pano nila papakainin ang anak nilang 2 digit ang number kasi di sila marunong mag family planning.. kami na masama .. iniisip lng naman namin ang effect in the future. sinasabi nyo na ‘We don’t have values’ pero how much lives this values cost us? mga namamatay sa gutom.. mga namamatay sa kakulangan ng supply sa gamot.. kamahalan ng gamot kasi mataas ang demaand dahil nga sa marami ang nagkakasakit na pilipino.. ang pagalis ng mga doctor na dapat ay gagamot sa atin pero pinili ang ibang bansa dahil mahirap kumita dito sa pilipinas.. eto lng ang point of view ko.. widen your thinking about this matter.. learn the cause of the problem.. a solution to the problem and the effect of the problem.. di ung rason na magkakaroon ng cervical cancer ang babae.. etc etc.. na nagfofocus lng sa isang single na problema .. think about the larger effects.. kahapon sa harapan sa abs.. napansin ko na ang reasons nila kung bakit ayaw nilang ipass ang bill eh one sided lng.. and they’re outraged by their emotions.. and proven na kapag nagiisip ka and may kailangan kang idecide.. gamitin mo utak mo.. be rational.. wag puro emosyon.. kasi base on personal experience ko with people around me that are emotional.. lagi pumapalpak.. and sa bandang huli nagsisi kung bat sila nagpadala sa emotion nila..
Kuya/Ate,
Walang enter keyboard mo?
i wish…i could just imagin some stand up comedian like eugene domingo using this article as material during the RH bill debate last night. i wouldve cried to tears and developed a six-pack after all the laughing.
Great Writing and Article! But one suggestion.. you should make your articles and sites(specially ironic and sarcastic ones) not accessible to idiots and douches. Cause with their intellect, they would surely understand you. 🙂 It’s depressing how many pro-RH bill people turned Anti after reading this article without using their brains.
I say this should be PG NON-IDIOT. Parental Guidance for Idiots is a must!