I used to support the RH Bill. I no longer do. By the end of this document, neither would you. I have not supported the RH Bill since I attended a lecture in Megamall about the truth behind it. That lecture truly enlightened me. My only hope is that this holy light of enlightenment passes through your monitor screen, into your optical nerves, and into your heart so it can touch your soul (because the soul is in the heart). My intent here is not to antagonize Pro-RH people, but to enlighten – so listen up, you narrow-minded morons. Open your minds to the real truth…
The RH Bill will put Filipinos at risk of extinction, because, at its very core, the RH Bill is an extension of a secret, global conspiracy – a western attempt – to implement principles of eugenics on unsuspecting, inferior populations in order to exclude them from the human evolutionary process, at the end of which would, at the apex, summon forth THE MASTER RACE. Anyone who failed to see this after the lecture is ignorant. I advise him or her to do his or her research, better yet, do some soul-searching to discover the real truth, because the truth is in our hearts, we just have to listen to it.
Initially, my layman’s interpretation of the RH Bill led me to think that it was just a bill meant to help educate the uninformed about ways to prevent them from fornicating their way to a very bad financial situation. My ignorant mind devised 10 simple points as to why the RH Bill was right.
I thought:
1. The minimum wage – the lowest an employer can pay an employee – of a non-agricultural Filipino worker is P404.
2. If there were 20 working days in a month (because most people don’t work on the weekend), the average minimum-wage-earning Filipino would earn around P8,000 a month.
3. Let’s call that person, Joey. If Joey, like other human beings, ate food on a regular basis, he will spend around P70/day on food (and that’s a very, very conservative assumption). There are 30 days in a month, so I guess, that would amount to P2,100 a month.
4. But if Joey had a wife that he loved, he might want to feed her too. Feeding her would cost another P2,100 a month.
5. P8,000 – P4,200 = P3,800
6. If Joey and his wife rented a home, or used electricity and bathed from time to time, the amount left from Joey’s salary would be significantly reduced. Let’s say their utility bills and rent amounted to P1800.
7. P3,800 – P1800 = P2,000
8. P2,000 is a lot of money, but I don’t think Joey and his wife should have more than 3 children, right? I mean, I don’t have children, but just by looking at one, I can safely assume that they cost more than P1,000/month. Babies need milk, diapers, toys, immunity injections, baby medicine…
9. From this I deduced that babies cost money. If babies cost money, I theorized that having more babies would cost more money. And from this data, I observed that a person who spent a lot of money on children, but didn’t earn a lot of money, would soon be broke and unable to provide for both himself and his children. Another word for this broke situation is poverty.
10. I theorized that a person can avoid being poor by making less babies. So, I thought that steps should be taken to inform people about this very little known fact. I also thought that the government should make contraceptives accessible so that people who don’t earn a lot can properly manage the little resources that they have. That’s why I supported the RH Bill.
But now I know that I was wrong. And here are some of the reasons why I know that. By the way, before I continue, I must say that this is the truth, guys. In fact, it’s more than the truth. It’s the Catholic truth, which means that it’s truer and more true than the regular truth.
I know that the issue of the RH Bill is not a religious issue, but make sure you pay attention if you want your soul to be saved. Here are some of the things I learned from the lecture I learned:
“The RH Bill is wrong because it assumes that the Philippines is overpopulated.”
I agree. I, myself, have observed that the Philippine is NOT overpopulated. In fact, if you use your common sense and think about it, you will realize a few things:
1. We are not overpopulated! Look at the mountains, the jungles, the caves and the ocean floor. There are no people there!
2. If we were really overpopulated, we would have trouble travelling. But if you go to EDSA, there’s no traffic. When you ride the MRT, it’s not packed with people.
3. Students in public schools are well educated because the teacher to student ratio is very low. In fact, because of our low population the government can basically guarantee that all public school students are provided books, notebooks and other school supplies.
“The RH Bill is wrong because it assumes that contraceptives are good for mankind and women.”
1. I agree, the RH Bill is not good for women because it might draw a woman away from her one, true, universal purpose – the uninterrupted production of healthy babies.
2. Furthermore, the role of women in society and the universe is to make babies. That’s why God made women. That’s their sole purpose in life. They’re not good for anything else. Ever wonder why there are no women in the clergy? Because they’re not good enough.
3. Contraceptives would allow women to enjoy the benefits of physical intimacy while maintaining a successful and productive career, if she so chooses. That is so wrong. Only men should be able to enjoy that privilege.
4. Women should get pregnant every single time they have sex and only immoral women enjoy sex without the possibility of conception. In fact, a better alternative would be for women, in general, to follow the example made by Mother Mary – to learn how to conceive without having sex.
“The RH bill will put Filipinos at risk of extinction!”
1. I agree. If we pass the RH bill, we will become extinct, like dinosaurs. The dinosaurs are all dead. If we don’t want to be extinct, we should not pass the RH Bill. I mean, do you really want to be a dinosaur?
2. In my opinion, it wouldn’t even be far-fetched to speculate that the most probable reason the dinosaurs became extinct was because they used contraceptives.
3. Population decline is just bad for nations. Just look at the countries which have a declining population – Italy, Japan and Singapore. They’re in such a bad shape. The Philippines obviously has a better economy and has a higher literacy rate than these countries. In fact, many Italians, Japanese, and Singaporeans go to the Philippines for work. That only goes to show that a decline in population is bad for the economy.
“Our population is our biggest asset!”
1. In my opinion, people should make as many babies as they can because the population is not a problem. In fact, the more babies a person has, the more assets he has. Forget real estate properties, stock investments, or Jollibee franchises. The real secret to increased wealth is babies.
2. If you have 15 babies, you’re practically wealthy because babies are assets:
2.1 If you need money, you can sell them.
2.2 If you can keep them alive until they can walk, they can one day beg for money in the streets – they’re going to have to anyway because there’s no way in hell you’ll be able to provide for all of them on your own.
3. If ever a person is not able to feed the 15 babies he made, it’s the governments fault, because it’s the governments sole responsibility to make sure that every Filipino baby is fed.
4. The best way a person can contribute to his country is to contribute to its population.
“The RH Bill is wrong because it assumes that reproductive education and contraceptives will effectively reduce cases of abortion.”
1. Reproductive/contraceptive education will have no effect on the number of abortion cases. In my opinion, these abortion cases will not lessen because women will continue to have abortions regardless of whether they are pregnant or not.
2. Abortions cannot be prevented. It’s just something that women naturally do. Like shopping, for example.
“The RH Bill is wrong because it will make people participate in extra-marital and pre-marital sex.”
1. By approving the RH Bill, we as a nation, are practically encouraging our people to engage in immoral activities.
2. We must protect our moral values and reject the RH Bill. Because, currently, not a single Filipino engages in pre-marital sex or extra-marital sex. As soon as this bill is approved, Filipino people will run the streets naked and start a national orgy!
3. The root cause of extra-marital and pre-marital sex is one’s exposure to contraceptives. There is just something in contraceptives that people find very arousing.
4. In Western countries, men lure strange women into bed by showing them condoms.
5. If we ban condoms, absolutely no one would engage in pre-marital or extra-marital sex.
“The RH Bill is wrong because it assumes that parents don’t teach their children about sex.”
1. The truth is that parents talk to their children about sex all the time. It’s so not awkward. The dad usually tells his children how he takes off all his clothes, does a sexy Tiger growl and makes sweet, sweet music with their mother’s body.
2. Also, a father usually advises his daughter that if she’s going to have sex with her boyfriend, she should use a condom. Sometimes the father even drives the daughter to the boyfriend’s house and waits for the couple to finish.
3. Filipino daughters don’t have sex without the father’s permission. Unwanted pregnancies or teen pregnancies never happen to Filipino girls. That’s why we do not need the RH Bill.
“The RH Bill is a conspiracy.”
1. It’s lies, all lies!
“The RH Bill is wrong because the priest said so, and priests are never wrong.”
The biggest reason why we should not pass the RH Bill is because the priests told us that we shouldn’t. As anyone should know, priests, men of the clergy, should be the authority on sexual and reproductive matters because they have the most knowledge and experience with sex and reproduction. They are true sexperts – legendary masters of erotic affairs. If you are a real Catholic, you would do everything they say, because they’re always right.
I love the satire. Well done, sir!
this will be cited in my next column
Zing! 😀
The problem with this satirical post is that it's tl;dr. Have you ever had that friend tell you a 10 minute rambling premise before he gets to an unfunny punchline? That's how this article feels like, it's like a basement dwelling know-it-all trying a crack at comedy about society.
you took 10 mins to read this? omglol.
nice one:) thanks for the enlightening sarcasm ….
@dustin: well written satirical article. i personally dont categorize this as sarcasm because you werent bllndly hacking away at people against the RH bill. in fact your SATIRE (let me stress that) was precise and surgical. i love how you gradually took it from normal to absurd and i enjoyed how people reading this were "hypnotized" by pacing them with agreeable statements and leading them with totally absurd claims.
everyone, i do not mean to sound elitist (well, in a way, we all are here.) but please do know the difference between irony, sarcasm and satire. before making comments here to get affirmation that you are "intelligent" simply because youre posting on a Freethinker's site.
*Kruger
i suggest everyone here look up the Dunning-Krueger effect.
there are two kinds of idiots commenting here. the first think this is real. the second think its sarcasm.
sir twin, ginamitan sya ng contraceptives peru nabuhay pa rin sya, yun nga lng hindi magets ang sarcasm.. hehehe
Best reply to Twin-Skies' comment! :))
if you don't effin get the sarcasm in the article, please don't comment so you won't embarrass yourself. jeeez.
to the author! good job! 🙂
Its not about most people not getting the sarcasm in this article. Its about the author being a bad comedian.
i can see a failed reverse psychology here. he he
In my opinion, the author was actually very good. But people really won't get the sarcasm considering that a lot of the readers commented even before they finished reading the whole article. Excited masyado.
It's a hot topic. People are sensitive about this i guess.
tama ka. i was about to comment without finishing the article. but then, as i read the first comment, i decided to continue reading. the article is good. at first i thought, ambobo lang pero when i continued reading, that's when i got the author's point.
Agree. Actually the last paragraph says it all.
i don't think it was meant to be funny at all. sarcasm just has that tendency to be funny and it is used as a tool in comedy. i think the tone is more of frustration. with a tinge of desperation (that people can be so adamant in going against the RH bill). this was a great read.
this article is so wrong… hahahaha… stupid
you are so stupid
NO U
LOL Hahahhaa. xD Amazing post, again. xD
Although you do have to take into consideration that the P404 minimum wage is only in NCR. Other locations have lower minimum wages, I believe. It's only 300-something here in Baguio.
The sarcasm was perfect, too bad it was lost on the dumbf*cks here
Sa author nitong article na to… Bakit di mo gawing direct to the point para maintindihan ng mga bobong katulad mo? Malamang natatakot ka. Kaso sa ginawa mo lalo lang naguluhan mga bobo sau. Eh malamang 50% mahigit ng mga pilipino bobo at isa ka na dun. May sarcasm ka pang nalalaman eh pano kung maniwala mga kauri mong bobo sau? Edi lalong dumami anti RH Bill. Meron nman din bobong di naniniwala sau kaso di nila alam na sarcasm lang sinulat mo kaya ok lng kasI tingin din nila sau bobo ahahaha. Saka pano kung foreigner makabasa nito? Pinasama mo pa image ng mga pilipino putang ina mong bobo ka!
Sa author nitong article na to… Bakit di mo gawing direct to the point para maintindihan ng mga bobong katulad mo? Malamang natatakot ka. Kaso sa ginawa mo lalo lang naguluhan mga bobo sau. Eh malamang 50% mahigit ng mga pilipino bobo at isa ka na dun. May sarcasm ka pang nalalaman eh pano kung maniwala mga kauri mong bobo sau? Edi lalong dumami anti RH Bill. Meron nman din bobong di naniniwala sau kaso di nila alam na sarcasm lang sinulat mo kaya ok lng kasI tingin din nila sau bobo ahahaha. Saka pano kung foreigner makabasa nito? Pinasama mo pa image ng mga pilipino putang ina mong bobo ka!
Hoy, Tanga. I think the author is so successful with his objective, bec of people like you. He should thank you, really. Sarcasm drives minds to thinking, being the direct to the point won't pave way to critical thinking as much as sarcasm does. Tsaka duh, kung nagdirect to the point siya, wala nang bago sa sinabi niya, malamang alam mo na rin yun kasi sooooooobrang talino mo.
Ikaw ang bobo. The mere fact you don't get sarcasm means you are incapable of higher intellectual understanding. Pretty sure foreigners would understand his point, unlike you, you stupid cunt.
Ikaw ang bobo. Magbasa ka nga kaya ko nga sinabing obvious eh kasi halata nman na sarcasm lang. Foreigners would understand his point? Di sa lahat ng part bobo! Sa tingin mo alam ng foreigner na laging traffic sa edsa? Na siksikan sa MRT? Na kulang kulang mga libre sa publich schools? Ang tanga mo talaga eh no???
Lam mo makukuha ng foreigners yun. Pero wait, are you talking about Japanese and Koreans non-english speaking foreigners. Kung ganon, tama ka! Galing mo! Di ko naisip yun Tanga.
Tumingin ka sa salamin, ano nakita mo? Tanga di ba?
Oo na kayo na ang magaling tanga na ko, di ko nagets kasi yung point ng article, buti binasa ko uli. Hehehe. Mejo natwa ko nung binasa ko uli
oo tanga ka kasi! bobo ka!
Tanga, if you actually took time to check on the author's previous posts before commenting, you would have realized that it's his writing style. Lumalabas tuloy na ikaw ang bobo.
Wala kong pakialam sa previous post nya bobo di un ang point kaya wag kang magmagaling inutil
[Bakit di mo gawing direct to the point para maintindihan ng mga bobong katulad mo?]
Oh eh anong point mo, ser? Writing style niya nga yun eh. Kung may problema ka dun or kung ayaw mo yung writing style niya, edi sumulat ka ng sarili mong article sa sarili mong site. Wag mo ring problemahin ang mga foreigner. Alam nilang satirikal ang sulat na ito at alam din nila ang purpose nito. Problemahin mo ang sarili mo bago mo problemahin ang mga dayuhan. Tanga.
Dear Tanga.
Tanga.
i like this part. haha
LOL!
well, hindi foreigners ang target ng post nya, TANGA. alam mo, TANGA, maganda yung style ng writing nya kasi madami ang nakakabasa nito. kung ordinary ranting lang, hindi ito makakakuha ng ganitong atensyon. okay, TANGA?
Mas tanga ka pala eh. Para mong sinabi na para sa atensyon lang kaya ginawa tong article at hindi para iparating ung message nya. Kung madami ngang nakakabasa pero marami nmang bobong di nakakagets wala din kwenta. Kaya mas tanga ka
TANGA MO TALAGA
SARCASMtoANUba = tanga
SARCASMtoANUba = bisaya
SARCASMtoANUba = bisayang tanga
Maganda nga to kasi nalalaman talaga sino sa mga kababayan natin na kailangang bumalik sa eskwela.
Tulad mo.
Bagay pangalan mo ser!
sarcastic din yung comment. lol
pareng TANGA,
ok lang yan tanga kung di mo nagets nung una mong basa… pero sana ngayon gets mo na… ang target ng author ay ang mga katulad mo.. huwag ka na masyadong ma pride na hindi mo nagets kaagad tulad namin… si Garz nga natawa na lang sa sarili eh nung nagets na niya…
kaya tanga, enjoy the message… digest it… at tulungan mo na lang yung mga kapwa mong di naintindihan kaagad…
ok lang maging tanga, tanga. Huwag mo nang idamay yung author…
ayos?
di bale, next time na may babasahin ka, hinga ka ng malalim at pagsdasal mo na maintindihan mo yung message….
ngayon, alam mo na ang sarcasm…
at sa tingin ko, hindi bobo mahigit 50% ng pilipino…. pero alam kong merong bobo dahil buhay ka pa tanga.
bawi ka na lang next time..
ok lang first time mo alng naman kasi mabasa ang isang sarcasm.. next time ikaw na ang magmamayabang na na gets mo at yung iba hindi….
peace
Nakatawa naman yang comment mo Tanga. Mabuti nalang at least alam mo kung ano ka, Tanga! Kung ako sayo balik nalang muna ako sa school. Tama na muna ang internet. Balikan mo muna yung mga libro mong pang grade1 ha. E mas matalino pa sayo yung aso ko eh. Kaya Tanga magaral ka ng mabuti para balang araw magamit mo yang kokote mo. Siguro naman meron ka paring matutulong sa Pilipinas, kahit taga punas lang ng pwet ng matatanda.
Tanga, bagay sayo pangalan mo.
so in summary tanga, mga bobo ang nagiging anti-rh bill, tama ba? 🙂
uhh para sa mga nanghusga kay tanga, tanga din kayo kasi siya sarcastic din.. so 1 level lang ng sarcasm kayang i-grasp ng utak nyo hahaha..
pinagtutulungan niyo si Tanga. feeling niyo di kayo Tanga. lahat tayo mga Tanga dahil pinatulan niyo isang tanga din. nahahawa na ako sa katangahan ng mga tao.
what a smart comment, Tanga!
Tanga. sumama ka sa mga hindi nakakaintindi ng satire na to. satire is a great literary technique, ginagawa nyang katawa tawa ang mga kalokohan sa buhay. na-entertain ako ng article na ito.
"Kaso sa ginawa mo lalo lang naguluhan mga bobo sau."
Obviously dahil ikaw lang ang nagrereklamo at nakakaisip na may naguguluhan, wala na kaming paki alam. Dahil sa bobo ka, ginagamit ko ang logic mo, inaassume mo na may malilito sa satirical writing. Sa comments dito, halatang ikaw lang ang tunay ng Tanga.
Wala akong nabasa kundi "tanga". Shit this article really is attracting stupidity doesn't it.
Wow. Unable to comprehend sarcasm. I've never thought of Sheldon Cooper as a real person.
Seriously dude, ang bobo lang dito ay IKAW. OMG. DI MO BA NAGETS NA SARCASTIC YUNG ARTICLE? JOKE LANG SIYA.
Ang nagpapasama sa image ng Pilipino AY IKAW. kasi di mo nakuha yung article.
Sa author nitong article na to… Bakit di mo gawing direct to the point para maintindihan ng mga bobong katulad mo? Malamang natatakot ka. Kaso sa ginawa mo lalo lang naguluhan mga bobo sau. Eh malamang 50% mahigit ng mga pilipino bobo at isa ka na dun. May sarcasm ka pang nalalaman eh pano kung maniwala mga kauri mong bobo sau? Edi lalong dumami anti RH Bill. Meron nman din bobong di naniniwala sau kaso di nila alam na sarcasm lang sinulat mo kaya ok lng kasI tingin din nila sau bobo ahahaha. Saka pano kung foreigner makabasa nito? Pinasama mo pa image ng mga pilipino putang ina mong bobo ka!
Alam mo may point ka. San ka ba nag-aral? Ang ganda ng realization mo. ( O yan ha, sarcastic yan… ang ibig sabihin kabaligtaran. One more example? hehe) PEACE! Wag ng kumoment kasi. Niyabang mo pa talino mo.
Basahin mo muna ulit ng buo post ko bago ka magcomment ha? Di ko na papaliwanag sau kasi sa tingin ko di mo rin maiintindihan kasi ang ang bobo mo. Simpleng post ko na lang di mo pa na gets. Nag comment ka pa ang kabobohan naman sinabi mo
Ang point ng isang commentary (komentaryo) ay para mapag-isip ang nagbabasa. Ano pang point kung sinabi lang ng diretso? E nagsulat ka pa. Ikaw lang ata hindi nakaintindi. Well, mga 10 kayo. Lokohin mo kong naintindihan mo e ganyan reaction mo. LOL
Balik ka na sa elementary
amen! amen!
Second the motion!
Just a typical troll on the internet. It's called a satirical essay and people like you who can't grasp the concept of his style of writing shouldn't be even here on this site in the first place.
sa author nitong comment na to.. dahan dahan.. atakihin ka sa puso… LOL
Ummmmmmmm… sabihin na nating mas makulay ang buhay sa sinabawang gulay.
Eto, isang baso ng malaming na malaming na tubig. Mainit ang panahon ngayon.
seriously, have you ever tried reading about sarcasm, skeptical? I guess not.
AMBOBO SARCASM NGA EE AMP NAMAN O
WOW. JUST WOW. There are so many dumbfuck Filipinos who don't get sarcasm or satire. This is another reason we should pass the RH bill. We need to mitigate the production of these fucking dipshits.
To Dustin, kudos to you classmate. Nice article.
As a member of Anakbayan and Kabataan Partylist, may mga mali po kayong datos.
-ang ratio po ngayon ng mga estudyante sa guro sa paaralan so far ay 45 (and still counting) to 1 unless mauuwi sa pagiging out of school youth which would be half-true…
– P235 ang so far naitalang minimum wage ng isang manggagawa for 8hours or more. hindi pa po kasama dito ang mga contractualized workers. (please refer to Ibon Foundation, our primary source of info)
Yung sa economy po ay half true po na mayaman ang Pilipinas… in terms of resources. Ngunit hindi po tayo nakikinabang kahit isang kusing dahil kung hindi ineexport para bilhin natin sa mas mahal na halaga, inaangkin ng mga dayuhang kumpanya ang ilan dito.
Half-true na rin po ang pagluwag ng mga pasahero sa MRT at LRT dahil po sa pagtupad ng Malakanyang sa fare hikes which was already implemented this March. <a href="http://(http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/breakingnews/metro/view/20110111-313870/LRT-MRT-fare-hikes-approved)” target=”_blank”>(http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/breakingnews/metro/view/20110111-313870/LRT-MRT-fare-hikes-approved)
Ang personal stand namin dito ay yes, dahil may mga bahagi sa bill na nasa burden na rin ng gobyerno (finally) ang tungkol sa Reproductive health, even guarantee abortion if the woman got unwanted pregnancy from rape for example, but consider some points na hindi dapat mauuwi sa pagcommercialize ng mga contraceptives or health services regarding this issue. Thank you
Ang hirap satin lahat ng bagay sineseryoso at di pinag iisipan ang totoong layunin nito.
Kung inintindi mo talaga yung binasa mo di ka ganyan mag rereact. Kaya nga SARCASTIC eh.
So, porket satire ay hindi ka pwedeng magcorrect ng maling datos? Tanung ko lang. Hindi sa ipinagtatanggol ko siya kung mali naman talaga pinost niyang mga detalye. Pero kung tama pala siya… may karapatan kang magyabang na marunong kang umintindi ng "satire"?
kua winston.. ndi necessarily correct and data na isinulat sa article.. sarcastic nga kasi. hello, ung pag tira sa ocean, sino ba mag iisip na nag kamali lang ng datos un, kaya nga sarcastic. hahaha! Bka figure of speech nya lang un, d ba may sarcasm na figure of speech?
O, so porket "sarcastic" yung article (actually "satirical" ang dapat tawag sa kanya, but that's beside the point) ibig sabihin lahat ng tinype ng author dito mali? Ang huli kong natatandaan, being sarcastic or satirical (whichever you prefer) does not mean na walang datos na pinagbasehan yung sinulat. Kasi pano ka makakagawa ng commentary, satirical or otherwise, kung wala ka namang ginamit na datos? Therefore, kung wala pala siyang laman, edi wala siyang kwenta, wala tayong mapupulot dito.
Don't preach on me about the ocean floor. Hindi ako tanga, alam ko kung kelan yun ii-invoke at kung kelan hindi.
wooow woow wooow, wag magalit.. kuya winston..
actually di xa gagawa ng article ng walang nag cause na nalaman nya.. at let me paste the copy of my comment, read between the lines..
"kua winston.. ndi necessarily correct and data na isinulat sa article.. sarcastic nga kasi. hello, ung pag tira sa ocean, sino ba mag iisip na nag kamali lang ng datos un, kaya nga sarcastic. hahaha! Bka figure of speech nya lang un, d ba may sarcasm na figure of speech? "
1. wala akong sinabing walang datos..
2. dun sa isang comment na nabasa ko knina ung may, like a christian ata un, i think its just the same, kc tulad nung ocean-thing wala sa article na nagsasabi na pwede talaga, like nung christian somment, d ko lang tanda ung mismong sinabi pero alam ko ung gusto sabihin, wala din na mag sasabi na ganon ang christians.
3. I never said na tanga ka, what I said "hello, ung pag tira sa ocean, sino ba mag iisip na nag kamali lang ng datos un", I didn't name-dropped any individual..
so wag ka magalit.. Di ko sinasabing tanga ka. at walang sinasabihang tanga ung article except sa mga makakaisip na may tama datos ung sa ocean. So I think with this siguro, sana nagets mo point ko. tnx
at nga pala may gusto iparating ung article, we just have to read it between the lines.
Gets ko naman ang punto mo eh. Ang hindi ko lang sigurado, kung nagets mo yung akin.
1. Wala ka ngang sinabing walang datos. Pero yung ginamit mo sa argument kong sinasabing may datos yung article ay alam nating lahat na point of sarcasm at therefore technically mali siya if treated as factual. So in a sense, hindi nakatulong yung sinabi mo (sorry) kasi ang ginawa kong punto ay for the correct data na ginamit sa pagbuild netong satire.
2. Buti nagkakaintindihan tayo dun kahit papano.
3. Di mo na kasi yun dapat pinaliwanag. Ang sinasabi ko kasi, using satire is based on facts. Para kasing namilosopo ka nung ginamit mo yung punto about the ocean floor. Eh sa tanga lang naman kasi talaga yung hindi makakaunawa nun diba. Hindi ko sinabing sinabi mong tanga ako. Sinabi ko lang na hindi ako tanga.
You don't have to read between my lines. Read them the way they are, or between the lines, it doesn't matter. Basta magets mo yung gusto kong sabihin.
hahaha nasaktan ka na natangahan ka ng literary piece na to. Ok lang yan EGO defense mechanism lang yan. It's quite normal. Nakakapikon lang you think you're so smart eh natangahan ka ng satire na to and to cover it up, you say all this bullshit about correct data and whatnot. DUDE, it's not funny if it's true. Yun yung fact na natatawa ako sa article na toh eh kasi horseshit yung data pero magaling ang pagkagawa. GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS!
If you read all of my posts, or if you tried to understand what I was saying, you'd be ashamed of yourself.
Don't preach on me.
Not to you, to "hello".
mali ka na nga eh,nagpapalusot pa, bakit di mo nalang aminin na ensnared ka sa trap ng literary piece na ito? ok na sakin ang bobo, wag lang bobo na ang nakatatak sa isip niya magaling siya, naku psychiatrist nalang ang may K magpaliwanag sayo!!!
If you read all of my posts, or if you tried to understand what I was saying, you'd be ashamed of yourself.
P.S. What if nag-aaral ako ng Psych? Kausapin ko sarili ko ganun?
one comment. ang bobo mo.
Explain.
“Sarchasm: the gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who doesn’t get it. (Tom Witte, Gaithersburg)” Washington Post August 2, 1998, Style.
nice definition!
hindi porket anakbayan o kabataan partylist ka, tama na ang mga sinasabi mo…. di mo gets yung point bobo.. you cant say yes tapos may pero pero ka…. tanga ka ba…. akala mo kayo na ang laging tama… dumbass!
hahahah!!! tama. agree!
Alien!!!
With all due respect, This article is said to be "Sarcastic". If you don't know what "Sarcastic / Sarcasm" means, kindly reffer to a dictionary..
http://www.merriam-webster.com/
With all due respect, This article is ACTUALLY satirical. If you don't know what "Satirical/Satire" means, kindly reffer (sic) to a dictionary.. http://www.merriam-webster.com/
one definition I found from the web:
sarcasm [ˈsɑːkæzəm]
n
1. mocking, contemptuous, or ironic language intended to convey scorn or insult
http://www.thefreedictionary.com/sarcasm
hehehehe..
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/satire
World English Dictionary
satire (ˈsætaɪə) [Click for IPA pronunciation guide]
— n
1. a novel, play, entertainment, etc, in which topical issues, folly, or evil are held up to scorn by means of ridicule and irony
as a member of anakbayan hahahahahahahaha
kawawa naman pangalan ng anakbayan nagmukahang katawatawa dito!!!! LOL,puro na lang kasi rally at posters la na ginawa araw araw, yan tuloy namemorya mga datos nila kaya kung saan saan sinasambit kasit sa satire lit piece!!
First, Uhm satire.
Second, Anakbayan, communists kayo di ba? Sucks to be you.
Third, talagang magpasok ng ibang issues of MRT fare hikes and minimum wage issues? LOL
Career reklamadors. I suggest you don't give a stand coz it will give either sides a bad light. hehe
LOL
"Second, Anakbayan, communists kayo di ba? Sucks to be you. "
Congratulations! You have just acted as any freethinker would and bashed other people because of their beliefs. Kinginang refutation yan: so what kung komunista sila? I suggest you also don't give a stand dahil wala ka namang sinabi about the RH Bill.
P.S. Kapag humirit ka ng "siguro komunista ka rin kasi dinepensahan mo yung mga komunistang to" edi wala na akong dapat sabihin sayo, kung ang tingin mo sa taong magdedefend sa right ng ibang tao na magsalita ay kapareho agad ng kredo nila ang kredo niya.
Can we just agree to not agree? Yep I think career reklamadors have no place in our society, so shoot me.
My comment was about his comment, and not about the essay. Bawal ba? Sorry I didn't know. 😉
And your PS, man you are so defensive. Ikaw na! Although you did hint on walking out too on another post. But yeah you are right, its the right of every person to choose his own ideology 😉 You are just SO right!
"Yep I think career reklamadors have no place in our society, so shoot me. ""Yep I think career reklamadors have no place in our society, so shoot me. " Sometimes I also feel like this. But what kind of retort is "communists kayo di ba? Sucks to be you"? What, is it a given that communists are societal rejects?
And malamang hindi bawal na magcomment sa comment niya dahil otherwise bat ako magrereply sayo diba. And the PS was a disclaimer which I felt necessary to put there, given your stance on communists. I'm sure you know na maraming ganyang tao na hindi nakikitang pagiging devil's advocate lang ang ginagawa ng mga nagtatanggol sa isang bagay.
Agreed to disagree.
hmmm, d ba china communist? hmmm, di ba may 1 child policy sila at zero birth plan dati? tama ba?
I don't know what you mean by that (I mean, if that was meant to attack what I said or what he said). And di ko rin alam kung ano gusto mong i-imply dito. Ang masasabi ko lang ay that is for the communists here to discuss, because simply stated, I do not like communism used as a form of government.
wala ako gusto imply.. just asking… kc d ko matandaan ung pinag aralan namin dati.. 🙂
"You have just acted as any freethinker would and bashed other people because of their beliefs."
-Aray naman dear, freethinker ako pero I don't just do what you just posted there. And I don't think na inherent trait or behavior sa aming mga freethinker ang ganyang gawain. So, easy lang! Wag mag generalize.
Sabi na me madadali nito. If you're looking for a sarcastic response, well – this is it. Sorry pero hindi ko siya mastate in such a way na kuha mo agad yung sarcasm (well I thought kuha agad, but your post declares otherwise). Sorry sa misunderstanding mate.
sucks to be a communist?you are so full of shit..buti nga sila pinaglalaban ang MRT fare hikes for the poor na d na maafford ang another increase, palibhasa kaya mong magbayad ng fare hike. putang inang middle class perspective yan. pano kaming mahirap lang?maglalakad na lang kami?
"RH Bill will have a boost from recent UNFPA forecast that world population will hit 7B by Oct 31 (9.1B by mid-century)! Population panic calls for global population control. They forget to mention that the wealth of richest families are also expected to rise to $202T by 2020, from only $92T in 2011! Their impotence to re-distribute this wealth compels them to make Third World poor literally impotent!"
wag mong gawing papity effect yang "pano kaming mahirap lang?". puro ka reklamo eh. i know the situation is bad but don't hate on a brother because he is in middle class and you are not. Mautak ang pinoy, kesa sa reklamo ka ng reklamo dyan do something about it. Gumawa ka ng paraan para maafford mo. ang daming tao sa lower echelon ng social hierarchy natin na gumagawa ng paraan para lang maka cope up sa pangyayare sa bansa natin, and yes, they complain from time to time pero they do something about it and they do not blame the rich people. You know why they are rich? because someone in the family or they themselves worked hard for it dumbass kasi ganun ang pinoy, we make solutions. Check yourself first dude before you go blabbing around how poor you are. DAMN! you're embarassing
Hahahahahaha. Umm… Hahahahahahaahahahahahah!
Um… hahahahahahahahhaahahahahahahhaahahaahahha!
Ganito na ba kayo mga taga-Anak? Di kayo nagbabasa?
– dating Anak
as a member of an intellectual body of the filipino people.. marahil maganda ang inyong hangad, half true lang din po ang pagkakaintindi nyo 😛
Panalo !!!
right.
minsan yan din ang epekto ng pagwawalkout sa klase para sumali sa mga rally, hindi natutunan ang different styles ng writing. 🙂
meh. hindi lahat ng "graduate" alam ang styles of writing. alam ba yan ng engineer? alam ba yan ng biologist?
engineer din ako. haha. gets ko naman. :p
biologist po ako at alam ko 😛
engineer ako, alam kong satirical to. 🙂
engineer here. kitang kita na ikaw ay isang arogante. hindi naman major subject ang styles of writing. kahit highschool alam ito.
dude, i am an engineer and i understand the idea behind sarcasm. please don't bring other professions to your level.
OSY ako pero alam ko ang sarcasm…charot!
Nagwo-walkout po ako pero alam ko ang satire 😀
Congrats sa nag-negative rating dito, because you totally missed the point. Salamat na rin kasi nag-aantay lang ako ng gagawa nito para mapaliwanag ko kung bakit yan yung sinabi ko.
Nainsulto kayong lahat na ang implication ng sinabi ng bigot sa taas na yung mga hindi naman English major ay walang alam sa figures of speech. Pero kung titignan niyo sinabi lang niya yun dahil sa isa pang bigot na nagsabing ang mga nagwo-walkout daw ay walang alam sa pag-aaral dahil hindi pumapasok. Tanong ko lang, kung ang mga non-English major ay alam ang figures of speech, pano pa ang mga nagwo-walkout? Eh high school, NO, elementary pa lang tinuturo na yan.
Wow, you talk too much. Suck a dick and have some cock in your ass if that will make you feel better cunt.
hindi nya nagets nung una yan tapos nung nakapagreact na sha maraming umaway kailangan nyang iregain ang kanyang pride hahaha. isip bata!! wwwooo!!!
Kasi what you people don't seem to realize is that I AM ON YOUR SIDE.
"Suck a dick and have some cock in your ass if that will make you feel better cunt. "
And you call me "isip-bata"?
i'm an accountant, and i understand hahahaha
engineer ako.. pero nagets ko ung article..
IT grad ako at naintindihan ko.
Chinese po ako pero naintidnihan ko rin ito.
Ako ay nagtitinda lang ng taho sa umaga at nagbobote't diyaryo sa hapon, pero naintindihan ko ang sarcastic humor ng may-akda.
Masyado mong minamaliit ang Engineers. Your argument is lame.
Grabe naman dude/dudette.. :p
"alam ba yan ng engineer? alam ba yan ng biologist?"
tsktsk. ang course-ist mo naman sir/ma'am..
yung datos mo, kahit sino pwede kumuha… hindi porket anakbayan ka at kabataan partylist eh credible ka na.. sana di mo na lang sinama yang partylist mong bulok sa pagpapakilala.. pinalalim mo lang ang libingan niyo….
i admire your courage na dinala mo ang iyong party sa usapan, kasi kapag ikaw ay nabansagang bobo, bobo na rin ang party mo.. at least hindi lang ikaw diba. magaling!
huwag mo na sila isama, kasi sayang naman ang pionaglalaban ng mga kasamahan mo… ikaw na lang. para ikaw lang ang bobo because i know you can stand by it.
sana magets mo na yung article.. sayang naman.. ayaw ng masa na may nakikipaglaban para sa kanila na isang bobo…
bobo mo. nakakainis.
OMG. Seryoso ba tong rebuttal ng taga partylist na ito? If so, utang na loob, wag nang iboto ang partylist na yan sa Congress. Lalong dadami ang mga mangmang sa Congress.
hahahaha.. nice!
hmmm..never use "half true" in pointing out "truths" It just makes you look more indecisive and , forgive me for saying, ignorant than the position you're trying to convey 😐
and please cite references like what you did in the "Ibon Foundation" part. Honestly, i never bothered verifying if your claims are "half true" from your citations, but it still makes something worth noting, even if the sources might be possibly wrong or biased, but heck, everything is biased.
kuya,wag tanga.basahin mo uli yung article.sarcastic nga eh.
Maybe he's/she's also riding with the flow… You know what I mean..?
Isa pa 'to… may datos pa.
Excuse po… lumuwag ang MRT dahil sa fare hike… hindi dahil nabawasan ang populasyon… wow… gandang excuse.
Sige humayo kayo at magparami pa! XD
honey, read the entire article.
are you a stupid small minded paranoid freak? get a life man. you are as stupid as hell. i bet you wouldve have been smarter if you didn't go to school and come up with these ideas. hahahahahahahahahahahah!
Dude, your efforts are wasted. Read the article first! Satire po ito.
I stopped reading when I saw extinction and that it was categorized as humor.
MA'AM THE ARTICLE USED SATIRE.
They are actually mocking the idiotic reasons of the church to oppose the RH Bill. The main point of writer is to prove that the church is being stupid and we should be actually supporting it because we should face the truth that the Philippines is currently experiencing terrible and skyrocketing overpopulation.
hi hayme. 🙂 idol talaga kita. masyadong tama ang mga datos na sinabi mo. kaya lang nasa rally ka siguro nung tinuturo ni teacher yung tungkol sa satire. 🙂 thank you
Mr./Ms. Hayme Malanatalan, hindi lahat ng data ay pare-parehas.. Iba-iba rin sources neto. Hindi porket member ka ng Anakbayan at Kabataan Partylist eh sa'yo lang ang valid na data.. 😐
Haynakerz. Nakakatawa pa rin first line mo: "As a member of Anakbayan and Kabataan Partylist,".. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!
"As a member of JOKES ON YOU Assn." hahahahahah. May mga datos ka pang nalalaman.
S-A-T-I-R-E
Your probably one of those who panicked yung na spread sa txt about the nuke fallout sa japan.
Serious mo. Here's for you: http://www.crossoverprofiles.com/profiles/blogs/h…
For the most part, this was excellent. But I do have a problem with your money argument:
"4. But if Joey had a wife that he loved, he might want to feed her too. Feeding her would cost another P2,100 a month…" Can't we assume that his wife works too? I mean, if a couple is strapped for cash, it makes sense that both of them would attempt to earn money. I just found the portrayal of man-as-sole-breadwinner pretty sexist, though maybe this is the norm in the Philippines, even among very poor families. (I'm not from the Philippines, so I wouldn't know).
that's not the point, dear.
Contrary to popular believe, alot of women here in the Philippines are housewives.
truly a great read… too bad some people just don't get sarcasm…
Too bad some people confuse satire for sarcasm.
my mistake then… it is a satirical piece 🙂
hahaha natatawa aq sa comment LOL
3. Contraceptives would allow women to enjoy the benefits of physical intimacy while maintaining a successful and productive career, if she so chooses. That is so wrong. Only men should be able to enjoy that privilege.shut the F*** up your so selfish.
ok na sana kaso kung ituring mo ang mga kababaihan ay parang baboy na inahin.. sayang…
you're, not your
You're po, not your. Also this is a satire so it looks like you failed to understand what it was all about. Read some more, ok?
you got the case of the "dumbs"?
Are you serious?
Galit na galit siya, ang cute diba? 😀
>ok na sana kaso kung ituring mo ang mga kababaihan ay parang baboy na inahin.. sayang…
Hindi okay kasi clearly di mo nagets yung point.
i really like your comment. you're so great. please educate us more with your feministic views, and we'll educate you about satires. 🙂
chucklevoski meets Rashine
1. I agree, the RH Bill is not good for women because it might draw a woman away from her one, true, universal purpose – the uninterrupted production of healthy babies. wew!! ilan ba kayong magkakapatid?.. kung yan ang role ng mga babae di sana yung ina mo hangang ngaun nanganganak pa..
LOL! Hindi mo na gets yung article.
hay.. tanga..
Jeez, some people here take this article seriously. can't you take a hint?
Though i am Pro RH and definitely agree with the layman monthly finance example above, I'm not convinced as to why people have to resort to sarcasm. A bit is good, but this is just waay too much it seems impulsive and emotional.
I quote Oscar Wilde
"Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit."
This is not witty at all. sounds desperate. I almost feel like this damages the Pro RH bill team.
Minus points for us.
didn't you know that when oscar wilde said that, he was being sarcastic too? hahahaha. reading fail.
you do know the difference between satire and sarcasm right?
A common feature of satire is strong irony or sarcasm—"in satire, irony is militant".
They usually go hand-in-hand.
I like Oscar Wilde, very humorous gay guy.
Here is the full line, "Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit…but the highest form of intelligence"
very sarcastic fellow, but also a lovable blowhard.
Oh for those who failed to grasp the article – a good read: http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/2005/may/23/psy… 🙂
Oh so self-righteous the 'free thinkers' are!
"I was sarcastic when I said something about the lowest form of wit."
ate/kuya/kung ano ka man, mali ata spelling ng pangalan mo. Dimwit ata talaga yan 😉
After reading several articles on both Pro and Anti RH bill.. I think this article is a good respite.
You sir, are one fine comedian. This made my day! Your biting wit and sarcasm punches idiots right where they need it. 🙂
well, parang hindi. O_o
ah sorry — kaw din ba yung "Grace"? nalilito na ko sa sinasagutan ko.
that aside, i still dont think being a child bearer is the SOLE PURPOSE of a woman as mentioned in the article (in sarcasm — baka sabihin ng mga tao, di ko gets).
proud na babae rin ako. dinudugo kada buwan, at gusto ko rin magka-anak one day. apat pa nga gusto ko eh. pero, hindi yun ang sole purpose ko.
wala lang. sharing lang ng opinion.
Obviously a sarcastic post. Good read. Sarcasm at it's finest.
Attention readers:
If you are reading this article literally, we strongly advise you to invest in one of these: http://www.jpost.com/HealthAndSci-Tech/InternetAn…
Seriously, take a hint.
Please say that the comments that look like they don't get it are just satirical comebacks…
I'm with you
kuya, ang lalim ng mga sinabi mo. marami big words. i fear she might not understand all that you said. 😛
Such delicious sarcasm. I LOVE IT!
Sarcasm detection fail.
I am feeling vagina envy as a man. Now I want to do it like mama Mary! Why can't I do it like Mama Mary?! WHYYYY! Salamat Dustin! Itinuwid mo na ang malli na kaalaman ko!
[i believe that in every Filipino people there are very supportive parents]
More often than not, it's another developing fetus that the parents will scarcely be able to provide for.
Just goes to show that even if you're for the RH Bill doesn't mean that you're actually thinking. I'm against the RH Bill and I immediately got that the article was driving its point through sarcasm.
Sarcasm much? READ PEOPLE. READ.
yeah yeah i know…^_^ but still, it just don't sound right when women are portrayed in such a way…
The Catholic church really is misogynistic. This is just the logical extreme of how they view women.
the problem with the church is that they don't know when to draw the line of involvement, they are there to give people moral counsel, but not to the point of pushing the things on which they believe in to people, and calling heretics of people who does not share the view of the church. We are entitled to our own views and opinions, and so long as it is free of malicious intent you are free to openly say what is on your mind…
Kaya nga satire. LOL!
The you obviously don't get it, or too dumb to understand. Get off this website… you.. you… Catholic!
LOL! i actually imagined the reaction
if being Anti would be synonymous to bigotry, naku you're just as a moron as the Pro's.
ang olats naman ng mga hindi nakagets. bobo.
The comments here proves that Pinoys really are stupid. *sigh*
don't generalize. 🙂
like in any other country, Philippines has their share of stupid people 🙂
law of averages applies to stupid. we have our fair share just like every country.
uncalled for, dude, uncalled for.
So uncool man. uhm Fuck you too. 🙂
I can't believe this was lost on some people. 😐
Welcome to the Philippines. Sarcasm is not exactly one of the humor styles our race is used to.
[" In Western countries, men lure strange women into bed by showing them condoms." ]
I tried that, and all I got was a slap to the face.
Perhaps that's stage 2 of this bizarre courtship ritual?
try using a used condom, it might give you a different reaction… Lol
who am i? "your article is so naive and sophomoric" — your comment is so naive and sophomoric hahahaha
Sarcasm, right? I just hope you made it clearer. Good job on driving people to read this article. But why the note on women? The sarcasm would certainly stand without the nasty note on women. If u need the money from the hits on ur blogs, u shud've at least spared the women coz i dont get u on that one.I mean, screw the government and the (catholic) church but zip it up on matters that are not so very important to ur point.Clear it up, boy or i'll hunt you down.
[Clear it up, boy or i'll hunt you down. ]
Grow a sense of humor, then come visit us.
tbh that's sort of what the bible is (biased vs women, see old testament) and what the catholic faith is (women cannot be clergy except for nuns)
well if you use some brain you'd understand that RH bill is actually (well, a part of it) fighting for the rights of women to choose. It gives them freedom to choose whether they have to become more than just being a mother. Sexually, it will also empower them. Why? Because they are the ones afraid to become pregnant and with the power to choose whether they will use contraceptives or not they can decide their own fate.
I respect your views. But I to tell you the truth, you are hallucinating! You're not in touch with reality.
I dont respect your views churva. To tell you the truth, you are probably high on drugs. You're not in touch with common sense.
You almost got me there!
good job
hahaha. many just dont get it.. i wonder where did they get their brains… read between the lines morons
nice article by the way
🙂