Atheism: My calling, a struggle in the Philippines.

The Philippines is known for its lovely islands and lovely people. A smile everywhere, that is what you see when you visit the islands. Beneath those smiles are real life stories of pain, suffering, torture, and fear of the unknown.

The Philippines is also known for its poverty, prostitutes, and children for sale, despite the fact that it is 80% Roman Catholic. A shame, indeed; people are still living in the dark ages: delusions of grandeur are a natural phenomenon for the very poor. Who, like Juan Tamad, wait for the apple to fall on their lap. It’s a pity for most, since money and jobs are scarce. People are forced to get out of the country, like myself, to make ends meet and savor the luxury of life.

I was in elementary school in grade five when I discovered science and when I became a skeptic. I could not accept my mother’s explanation that I came from a bamboo split open by lightning. I thought that it did not make sense at all. I had questions galore that nobody could answer. I just let it go, but, at the back of my mind, my questions lingered. I went with the flow and joined a choir at our nearby church.

The military church was always jam-packed with people taking communion. These were the same people who loved to gossip and backstab their neighbors. It’s funny, but those who go to church are the most abnormal in my eyes. They are good only with their own flock and those outside their circle were treated like garbage. They treated me like garbage: another confusion and cobweb in my mind. Why did a god allow this? I let it go. Who am I to question their behavior? Who am I to question a god? I am only a small fish.

I have never been religious. I was forced to go to church only by my mother, who thinks everything came from a god. In college, a military chaplain (priest) was always showing me his erection even inside the church. I was as naive as a newly bloomed flower and could not understand what was that all about, until one night, at a party. He tried to get me drunk and he brought me to a secluded place. I realized something was wrong with that scenario and I ran away, never to come back to that church again. However, I did not report the incident to anybody. Who am I? People will just wag their tongues and brand me as a girl of “ill repute.” Besides, who will believe a poor girl like me?  A priest could never do such a thing!

I was a very good girl. Why on earth was I not receiving gifts from Santa Claus? Another case for detective work for me. I did my own research. I asked around and did my very own investigation.  At an early age, I was able to crack the mystery that there was no Santa Claus. Parents played Santa but, because we were poor, we did not get any gifts from our parents. There was no Santa. He never appeared to me nor had I ever seen a trace of him. There was no Santa Claus.

I  was still on searching mode when I finished college. I graduated at the top of my class,  cum laude at a famous university in the Cebu province. I went to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia due to the need to secure some funds so I could go to the USA. While in the KSA, I almost became a Muslim. I thought it was necessary at that time. I almost memorized the whole “salah” . Things happened for a reason, at least that was what I believe in before. I had a very tragic experience in the KSA. Long story short, a Filipino man persuaded me to believe that he was the right man for me and we ended up marrying and produced one child. He ran away, never to be seen again. What did I do wrong? Where did I go wrong? I accepted that it was just a test of my existence.  Still, there were cobwebs in my mind. Why do bad things happen to good people? If there were a god, wouldn’t he, at least, intervene or stop these misfortunes in my life?

My skepticism was once again rekindled. I went to the USA where discovered that I was really free to practice religion. Still, I went searching. I joined a born again/Christian group who thought that they were saved. I thought I was also saved. Until, one time, the pastor wanted a ten thousand dollar donation from me. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Why should I donate that much? I had no money! Long story short, I did not go back to that church, because I felt like they were ripping me off. Aren’t we supposed to give what we can afford, not be forced to share 10% of our income? I could not understand the logic behind it. It was another query about the importance of religion and god.

I witnessed 9/11, a true tragedy. It was bigger than life. Why would a loving god allow this to happen? There were good and bad people in those twin towers. Why? Again and again, the good were victimized. Is there a god? Where is he? Is he worthy of my praise? I guess not. So, I came out as an atheist.

Actions speak louder than words. I am tired of debates, discussions, and trying to convince people that atheism is a better way of life—no more wastage of emotions, prayers that are not effective, tithes, and church meetings with hypocrites and gossipers.

Atheism is still a struggle in the Philippines. It connotes Satanism, evil, demons, and what have you. Some truly negative connotations. Who cares? I made all my sisters atheist without much ado. They saw my struggles, they saw my success and, better still, I became the Santa Claus in our household.

I am now a militant atheist. I support all atheistic movements in the Philippines. I have teamed up with some atheistic groups on the Internet and we are ebullient in proposing projects, all in the name of atheism. Groups to reckon with are the Filipino Freethinkers, the Critical Thinking Filipinos, The Pinoy Skeptics, and Pinoy Atheist.

Why am I doing this? Because I want to pay it forward. I want to propagate atheism in the Philippines as an alternative to any organized religion.  I am encouraging Filipinos to believe in themselves, put their best foot forward, be kind and good without god, and stop with the delusion that a god is watching over us.

“There are no gods, no devils, no angels, no heaven or hell. There is only our natural world. Religion is but myth and superstition that hardens hearts and enslaves minds.” — Anne Nicol Gaylor

20 comments

  1. I think we shouldnt be blaming religion for all of these unfortunate events. I think without religion we would end worse than these. I am also a frethinker like you. Though admittedly there are some religious leaders who are fanatics so much so that they end up encouraging and leading their followers to destroy other people/sects/whatever, I believe that religion is just like any other ideal created to establish harmony with one another. There are good things in religion; we should adopt them. For the bad things, we should modify them to make us better people.

    • but for the course of history, almost genocides and mass killings are caused by the delusion of religion. Remember the Jewish holocaust of WWII? How about wars between moors and christians? Bloody religious battles and crusades? The killing of so-called "witches" that were condemned that were rather innocent of any crime? When religion became more of a political entity? If religion wasn't "INVENTED" I believe that more people could have been alive. And no terrorists, no 9/11 and the bombings that were totally acted by delusional brainwashed religious people>>>>w/c causes another "religion" to be racist towards that religion and the anger and hate goes on and on around circles just like my comment.

  2. [I want to propagate atheism in the Philippines as an alternative to any organized religion. ]

    One should remember that we atheists do not think alike and converting someone into an atheist is not an assurance that that somebody will have the same world view as yours. A better way of putting it would be propagating logic, reason and rational thinking. =)

    [I am encouraging Filipinos to believe in themselves, put their best foot forward, be kind and good without god, and stop with the delusion that a god is watching over us.]

    Totally agree. 😀

    • Atheism = Diploma

      I agree. Atheism should be more like a black belt – a mark of honor signifying the amount of critical thinking that said person put into their lives to reach it.

  3. "The military church was always jam-packed with people taking communion. These were the same people who loved to gossip and backstab their neighbors. It’s funny, but those who go to church are the most abnormal in my eyes. They are good only with their own flock and those outside their circle were treated like garbage. They treated me like garbage: another confusion and cobweb in my mind. Why did a god allow this? I let it go. Who am I to question their behavior? Who am I to question a god? I am only a small fish." – narsdoktor

    Oh they do it amongst each other in "mysterious" ways, more subtle. If its not about the new car and jewels, its the shoes and it carries on at their homes this time venting on where the maid went late last night. These are hard facts of life, I too attest to the articles assertions.

    Very good read.

    A call to sanity…

    "Why am I doing this? Because I want to pay it forward. I want to propagate atheism in the Philippines as an alternative to any organized religion. I am encouraging Filipinos to believe in themselves, put their best foot forward, be kind and good without god, and stop with the delusion that a god is watching over us."- narsdoktor

    • Jeremy: I consider your post as SPAM !
      You haven't posted a single argument yourself but just continue to post links to William Lame Crap's circular reasoning site.

      In a nutshell about chief apologist WLC: God exits because of the resurrection – well it's very improbable … insert 30 minutes of irrelevant Bayes theorem to fill the time …. but an omnipotent god can resurrect easily like child’s play – but does god exists ? – yes because of course because of the resurrection. YAWN !
      Even WLC admits that you never reach god as conclusion by bottom up reasoning of available facts and evidence – you ALWAYS have to pre-assume god to reach the conclusion of god after a short circle.

  4. I'm on your side. We will propagate atheism in our country. This is my mission since 1989. We know religion is a scam. They use religion to rake the treasure of our country.

  5. All the anger. All the rage. All vehemence against a self-created god. A lot of things happen in the mind. What makes you think that your resolution isn't just your mind playing tricks with you?

    • You are trying to create "Doubt" in to mind of the author. That's a trick used by scammers.
      She is just telling us her experiences with men, family & religion and you try to say that it is false. What I see in her story is that there are people who try to deceive her every where she goes. Isn't the story of Santa Claus a deception by parents? The priest tried to deceiver her in order to have sex. The mind does play tricks on people and that creates openings for the person to get cheated. All a scammer has to do is to feign so as to acquire the confidence of the person then they can what they want from them.

    • [What makes you think that your resolution isn't just your mind playing tricks with you? ]

      Reverend Jim Jones, Son of Sam, Pat Robertson, Fred Phelps, Osama Bin Laden, Ayatollah Khameini, Mahmoud Ahmahdinejad.

      The list of people who don't some seriously crazy shit to their fellow men because their mind's convinced them it's all in the name of some divine being goes on and on.

  6. I am really shocked you are so godless and don't like to donate 10,000$ to the (self proclaimed) “man of god”.
    So you are also one liek me brandished as "unwilling to pay in front of god" – to quote the priestly sermon during the funeral of my mother, so that the whole congregation might know, that the family members (my sisters, stepfather and myself) all resigned from paying church taxes endangering the priests lavish monthly salary.

    And still feel very sorry for guru Bhagwan (‘Osho’ Shree Rajneesh) who’s spiritual missions collection should result in 365 Rolls Royce cars (1 for each day of the year), but his flock miserably failed their god falling short after at a mere 69 cars …… how sad.

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